


Simon Snow and the Drunken Engagement

by TeddyBearDoctors



Category: Carry On - Rainbow Rowell
Genre: Alternate Universe - No Powers, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Bottom Baz, Drunken Shenanigans, Engagement, Kissing, M/M, Masturbation, Misunderstandings, Porn With Plot, Possessive Behavior, Sexual Content, Social Networking, Top Simon, Wall Sex, but its a small plot
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-11-11
Updated: 2015-11-11
Packaged: 2018-04-28 08:31:18
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,496
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5085541
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TeddyBearDoctors/pseuds/TeddyBearDoctors
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>we were both drunk when you proposed to me and i accidentally posted about it across social media so now we’re hungover and trying to figure out this mess bc we’re not even dating AU</p><p>Simon and Baz wake up to realize everyone thinks they got engaged, but they aren't even friends really. Of course a situation like this can only lead to Simon fucking Baz against a wall, right?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Simon Snow and the Drunken Engagement

**Author's Note:**

> I just love writing SnowBaz and I started writing smut recently so ya this happened....

 

Baz wakes up and his hands go right for his head, his skull pounding and his eyes burning. He really should stop drinking, Snow always brings out his competitive side and they both try to drink each other under the table. Every single time. Snow isn’t even his friend, he’s Bunce’s friend, and yet they keep doing this.

Bunce wasn’t even there, just Snow and him, so why they stayed out together and got drunk was beyond Baz. Beyond what he wanted to admit to himself anyway, beyond what he realized at the time actually.

Baz looked over and realized Snow is in bed with him, curled tightly around himself with his head of honey curls resting on Baz’s chest.

“Move, Snow.” Baz rolls his eyes and shoves the boy away from him. Snow moves willingly but makes a wine of disapproval as he loses his hold on Baz.  Baz will never admit that the sound almost made him let Snow roll back on top of him.

Baz snatches his phone from where it was thrown on the floor and he frowns at the three missed calls, sixteen messages and the many notifications from facebook. He rolls his eyes, figuring he posted something stupid last night, and tosses his phone to the side in favour of making tea and taking a hot shower.

\--

Simon wakes up with a loud groan and the feeling that a jackhammer was let loose in his head. He curses as his phone starts to ring, the loud and obnoxious default ringtone he hasn’t bothered to change. He finds his phone tangled in the blankets and almost considers letting the call go to voice mail until he realizes its Penny.

“Morning,” He grumbles only to be greeted by a loud shriek.

“You motherfucker!” Penny practically shouts and Simon flinches away from the phone.

“Please, Penny, I have a hangover.” Simon sounds pathetic even to his own ears.

“Where are you!?” She doesn’t quiet down and Simon really wants to hang up. He can smell tea steeping in the kitchen and the shower running in the bathroom, who did he go home with? He groans as memories flash and he sees himself stumbling into bed with Baz. Fuck.

“Baz’s.” He answers and Penny laughs.

“Should have known, gotta celebrate you two.” She sounds so smug and Simon really doesn’t want to know why.

“Can we talk about this later?” Simon asks carefully and Penny sighs.

“Fine, but call soon. Love ya!” She smacks kisses into the phone before hanging up. Simon glares at the phone as it lights up with 6 missed messages and 2 missed calls along with facebook practically exploding in his notifications menu.

“What the fuck happened.” He clicks on facebook and goes white as a sheet at the post on his wall.

  


“Baz!” Simon shouts and hears him curse from the shower. Simon really does try not to think about Baz in the shower, dripping wet and ENGAGED TO HIM. But he can’t help it, the image of Baz rubbing soap all over his body with a ring on his finger, a ring Simon gave him, is now etched in his brain and  making Simon blush and uncomfortable in his jeans. He knows Baz doesn’t have a ring but that doesn’t stop himself from thinking it.

“Shit,” Simon whimpers as he presses a hand to his aching cock, trying to relieve the pressure but only making it worse. His mind is a mixture of Baz and showers and fucking engagement rings and his need to get back to his own room before Baz finds him wanking in his bed. Simon does try to stop but his brain is clouded with lust and his hand doesn’t want to stop rubbing against himself through his pants, little whimpers and gasps escaping his lips.

“Baz,” The name slips out as a moan and Simon’s hips jerk up as his eyes go wide and he flushes red. He pulls his hand away and squirms under the covers, hating himself and really hoping he wasn’t as loud as he usually is.

Baz comes out a second later, clad only in a towel and dripping wet. His dark hair is hanging in his face and Simon wants to run his fingers through it, chase the water that falls from his hair and runs down his neck and chest. Simon’s cock twitches and he bites his lip to keep from moaning.

“If you’re gonna look, Snow, you can at least pretend to be discreet.” Baz smirks as he gathers his clothes and vanishes back in the bathroom. Simon shoves his hand down his pants the second Baz leaves, practically sobbing at the feeling of his hand around his prick. It’s stupid and reckless but he can’t control himself around Baz, especially when he’s only in a towel and Simon can’t stop thinking about wedding rings and Baz being _his._

Simon starts jerking himself off in quick twists of his wrist, biting his lip until it bleeds to keep himself quiet. He imagines Baz finding him like this, a whimpering mess and all for him; he wonders what Baz would do. He chooses to imagine Baz would climb on top of him and wrap his elegant fingers around Simon, leaving messy kisses on Simon’s lips as he jacks him off. Simon comes with a groan of Baz’s name, come staining his boxers and jeans. His hand is sticky and he wipes it on his pants, shame colouring his cheeks.

“Simon?” Baz comes out of the bathroom, dressed in sweats and an old t-shit, confused look on his face. Simon nearly faints at the thought that Baz heard him but he isn’t even looking at Simon, he’s looking at his phone with wide eyes and mouth hanging open.

“Shit, you went on facebook.” Simon says. He had hoped Baz would stay off his phone long enough for Simon to delete everything and set everyone straight but looks like that plan fell through.

“Ya, and according to facebook and everyone we know, we’re married!” Baz is confused but Simon can see the anger bubbling beneath the surface.

“Engaged actually.” Simon corrects and then flinches when Baz shoots him a glare.

“Why did you post this? Why do you think I proposed to you?” Baz growls and Simon cowers, feeling exposed.

“I don’t know, we were drunk.” Simon answers. “I think your tea is done.”

Baz gives him an odd look, nostrils flaring before turning and heading into the kitchen. Simon sighs in relief and darts into the bathroom.

\--

Baz pours his tea down the drain, his stomach twisting. Simon is his, well on facebook anyway, and just the thought leaves him dizzy and grinning. Simon is probably calling up Bunce and telling her to correct everyone, delete the posts and everything, and the thought makes Baz frown, much to his own annoyance.

“Simon Pitch, Baz Snow,” He tests the names and smiles at both, loving how they both taste. Baz leaves his phone on the table and stalks over to his bed, falling face first on the blue sheet. He inhales deeply and groans in frustration, his bed still smells like Snow, smoke and coffee.

“Baz?” Snow is standing at the end of the bed, blush high on his cheeks. Baz notes the odd stain on the leg of his jeans and how the front seems to be wet. Shit. Did Snow come in his jeans?

“Snow,” Baz sits up, smirking at the boy, “were you jacking off?”

Snow sputters and goes red in the face.

“What were you thinking about?” Baz walks over to him, using his small height advantage to look down on Snow. He looks embarrassed and his eyes won’t look Baz in the face. “Was it me?” that certainly gets his attention, Snow’s eyes going wide and fearful.

“I-I’m sorry.” Snow stutters out and Baz grins filthily at him. Baz backs Snow against the wall, keeping him there with hands on each side of his head.

“Tell me what you were thinking.”

Snow gapes at him for a moment.

“I was thinking about you in the shower,” Snow mumbles and Baz hums. “You were wearing a ring, an engagement ring, and you came out to find me in your bed with my hand down my pants.”

“You were touching yourself in my bed?” Baz feels his cock twitch, coming to hardness at the thought.

“Y-yes.” Snow replies shakily. “Gods, the thought of you actually being _mine_ was overwhelming.” Snow admits, biting his lip. Baz groans and buries his face in Snow’s neck, breathing in the smell of sex and citrus body wash.

“Gods, Snow, say that again.”

“What?”

“Call me yours,” Baz tells him and presses himself against Snow, letting him feel his arousal. “ _Please,”_

Snow gasps and his hands fly to Baz’s hair, holding him close.

“You’re mine, Baz, only mine.” He mumbles the words in Baz’s ear and the dark haired boy moans and jerks his hips against Snow’s. “ _Mine,”_ he repeats and leaves open mouth kisses down Baz’s neck, making him shiver and press closer.

“Yes, I’m yours.” Baz rambles, his brain switching off and his mouth going into hyperdrive. “Fuck me, Snow, make me yours.” Snow gasps at that, spinning Baz to face the wall. Snow stands behind him, mumbling ‘mine’ over and over as he pulls Baz’s pants and underwear down, exposing his ass to him.

“So beautiful,” Snow breathes and Baz shivers as his breath ghosts across his neck.

“Stop teasing,” Baz groans, dropping his hand to his prick and sighing at the friction. He doesn’t get very far, Snow snatching his hands and pinning them to the wall. “Snow!”

“ _Simon,”_ He growls and Baz shivers, hating the mess Snow turns him into. “Call me Simon.”

“Simon,” Baz moans and cants his hips back so his ass presses against Snow’s cock.

“Fuck,” Snow whimpers and uses one hand to hold Baz’s hips still and the other to keep his hands above his head. He vanishes and Baz wines at the loss, only to gasp a second later when Snow reappears. He hears Snow squeezing lube onto his fingers and Baz tries to hide his face in his arms but the angle is awkward with Snow holding his wrists and he only manages to press his forehead into the wall.

Snow presses a lubed finger against his hole, making Baz jump and gasp.

“This okay?” Snow asks and Baz whimpers, nodding. Snow presses his finger in then, starting to stretch him open. Baz is a mess, whimpers and moans of Snow’s name-his real name-leaving his lips as Snow adds another finger and then another. He feels broken open, vulnerable and exposed in a way he would only trust Snow to see him.

He doesn’t know when he fell in love with Snow but at the moment the feeling in his chest is painfully obvious.

“Please,” Baz begs, presses back against his fingers, needing something more.

“Please what?” Snow asks, sounding breathless. Shit, is fingering him turning Snow on? Baz outright moans at the thought of Snow standing behind him with his cock hard and leaking as he finger fucks him.

“Please, Simon, I want you inside me, please!” Baz feels hot all over, flushed and raw. He whimpers embarrassingly as Snow removes his fingers, leaving Baz feeling empty. He’s about to complain when he hears Snow drop his pants and then squeeze more lube to slick his cock. He only has to wait a few moments before Snow is pushing into him, gasping and dropping his wrists so he can hold Baz’s hips with both hands. Baz moves his arms to brace himself against the wall.

“You feel so…fuck, _Baz_.” Snow moans and just the sound of his name being said like that from Simon Snow’s lips is enough to push Baz so close to the edge he has to grip the base of his cock to keep from coming.

Snow starts fucking him with slow twists of his hips, making Baz almost come with each movement. Snow is loud, something Baz didn’t see coming, he gasps and moans and talks as he fucks Baz into the wall, voice sounding broken and wrecked.

“Gods, you feel amazing. I wanna fuck you forever,” Snow mumbles into Baz’s shoulder, teeth scraping along his skin. “You’ve no idea how often I’ve thought ‘bout this,” Baz thinks he does. “Of fucking you, of touching you and hearing you say my name like it’s the only thing you know how to say.”

“ _Simon, please,”_ Baz wines and presses back into the boy, making his rhythm stutter.

Snow moans and starts pressing open mouth kisses down Baz neck and shoulders, his hand dropping to his cock. Baz releases his prick as Snow takes hold, jerking him off in a slow rhythm that matches his hips. Snow groans and speeds up, pounding into Baz as his hand speeds up on his cock. Baz comes first, sinking his teeth in his bottom lip as he comes hot and sticky all over his chest and the wall.

“Fuck,” Snow whimpers and slows down, jerking Baz through his aftershocks. Baz tries to move away from Snow as well as push him deeper, battling between his sensitivity and his need to hear Snow come undone.

Snow only takes a few more jerks of his hips before he is moaning Baz’s name brokenly and shooting deep in his ass. Baz shivers at the feeling, dropping his head backwards to rest on Snow’s shoulder.

“Mine,” Snow mumbles as he presses a kiss to the corner of Baz’s lips.

“Yours.” Baz agrees.

Snow pulls out, both of them wincing at the feeling. Baz turns around and wraps his arms around Snow’s waist, finally bring their lips together in a messy kiss.

“Who knew a fake engagement could have such positive consequences.” Snow says with a smile.

“Shut up, Snow.”

\--

“So you’re not engaged?” Penny asks as she sits on Simon’s couch. Baz is on the desk chair, perched like a bird and watching Simon with a soft look in his eyes.

“Nope, just a drunken mistake.” Simon shrugs and Penny deflates.

“Disappointed, Bunce?” Baz asks and she rolls her eyes.

“Honestly, I don’t want you getting engaged without me being involved. But I was glad you were finally together.”

“What do you mean finally?” Simon asks.

“You have been dancing around each other for months!” Penny exclaims and Simon frowns along with Baz.

“So not true.” Simon replies. “I was discreet with my affections.”

“Do you even know what that means, Snow?” Baz asks and Simon sticks his tongue out at him.

 “So what now?” Penny asks.

"Now, Baz comes with me to get coffee." Simon says with a smile.

"Are you asking me on a date, Snow?" Baz asks with a smirk and Simon raises an eyebrow.

"I thought I told you to call me Simon?" Baz so totally does not blush. 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading! *runs and hides*


End file.
